by Sister Sunshine Smiles
In the bareness of this world, we find our hearts growing hard. We begin to get more involved in our own self and care lesser about others. We begin to sin mindfully unable to realize the graveness of the situation. We don’t understand, how slowly and steadily we are unconsciously taking steps away from our Deen.
We wander, in our idleness, in any direction. The minute our minds are idle Shaytan is working tricks in there. We think unnecessarily and we make blunders. And then we work and live on those blunders. We move away from our focused goals. We get confused in the diversity of the actual destination and the road that may lead to it. We compromise on our strictness and we expect Allah(SWT) to understand and forgive. Why shouldn’t we be forgiven? The reasons for our deception are innumerous after all. And the truth is that we are all sinners. And we will continue to be the same, knowingly and unknowingly. Sometimes out of ignorance, sometimes out of plain provocation, And sometimes, out of utter senselessness and our inability to function at certain times. Something that the Shaytan takes full advantage of.
In such perspective how does “Distance make the heart grow fonder.”
Most of us are familiar with this famous quote. And when it comes to grounds of interpretation our instincts flow towards the material reasoning. It may hold true for your better half living halfway oceans apart or it maybe true for your nearest family members who you have migrated away from after marriage or it may be due to your university that is keeping you away from your family for pure career purposes. Whichever reason it is, we all will agree that most of the times, when you lose something, you realize its worth even more. And sometimes, we know its worth but fail to give it the importance that it deserves. Why? Because we live in a world that is too busy hypnotizing us to the unimportant things by making it look more important in this world. Whatever it is, if I am talking in perspective of people, staying away from the people you love makes you realize their importance and their worth and how dependent on them you have been. It makes you realize that every person in your life plays a role and most of the times we tend to ignore the tiny roles which happen to hold great significances.
When I was a teenager I wanted my space, my privacy, my freedom like every youngster these days wants. And I fought for it knowing that it probably wasn’t the best measure to resort to but for me, it was important to make my parents realize that where we lived wasn’t the best place to acquire higher education. Though now in time, I have learnt that acquiring Islamic education holds way more importance than the worldly one, Alhumdulillah. Anyways, in this whole “running behind what I want to become” process I didn’t realize how far from my Deen I was taking myself to, like literally but unintentionally. I would barely call myself a practicing Muslimah in that time and I, very conveniently made excuses to myself for the stacks and heaps of sins I was accumulating. But in my heart, however, the seed of my religion was deeply routed and nurtured by my parents from childhood so I knew I was faulting. I kept saying to myself that I needed to get better no matter how difficult it was going to be yet until I graduated out from University there was a minutely noticeable change in that.
What happened after that is the part I love the most. After I moved back with my family, I had this yearning to repent for being such an unpractising Muslimah. I felt terribly guilty for using worldly excuses and putting away more important things under the carpet. Islam had always interested me as I was growing up and I had too many questions to find answers for, hence my hunger for the knowledge of my Deen. When I set out to the path of increasing my knowledge I felt at instant peace. I knew that this is something I wanted to keep growing with.
Today, I know that my knowledge is probably like a few drops as compared to the ocean of wisdom that Islam has to offer to me and I know that my journey will be long and challenging. But I am also very sure that my real journey has started off, May Allah keep me guided always, InshaAllah.
I also hope that Allah(SWT) guides us Muslimahs to the light and that we all learn in our own ways. We all have different lives and different experiences and I hope we all benefit and learn from what we are put through.
I would like to end with the wise words of Ibn Qayyim that brought solace to me on reading,
"Sin may be more beneficial for a person, if it leads him to repent, than doing a lot of acts of worship.”
This is what is meant by the words of one of the salaf: A person may commit a sin and enter Paradise because of it, or he may do an act of worship and enter Hell because of it.
When asked, “ How is that?”
He said: “He may commit a sin and continues to think about it, and when he stands or sits or walks he remembers his sin, so he feels ashamed and repents and seeks forgiveness and regrets it, so that will be the means of his salvation. And he may do a good deed and continue to think about it, and when he stands or sits or walks he remembers it and it fills him with self-admiration and pride, so it is the cause of his doom.”
So we all fall into ditches occasionally! Some of us are pushed into it, some trip in by mistake and some choose to jump right in. But, At the end of it, what matters is, how much that struggle in getting out of the ditch teaches you and how well you manage to dust yourself off !
So we all fall into ditches occasionally! Some of us are pushed into it, some trip in by mistake and some choose to jump right in. But, At the end of it, what matters is, how much that struggle in getting out of the ditch teaches you and how well you manage to dust yourself off !
1 commentaires:
beautifully written MashaAllah:)
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