The Story Of The Queen Ends (Part 3)

by Umm Sulaym


be sure to read Part 1 and Part 2 of this series before you proceed

‘Do you like him much?’

‘I told you I liked him a little. Where is the use of caring for him so very much? He is full of faults.’

‘Is he?’

‘All boys are.’

‘More than girls?’

‘Very likely. Wise people say it is folly to think anybody perfect; and as to likes and dislikes, we should be friendly to all, and worship none.’

‘Are you a wise person?’

‘I mean to try to be so. Go to sleep.’

Thoughts of the ‘wiser’ character :‘How will she get through the shocks and repulses, the humiliations and desolations, which books, and my own reason tell me are prepared for all flesh?’

[chapter 3 of Villette by Charlotte Bronté]

***

‘Whoever amongst you worshipped Muhammad, Muhammad is dead. But whoever worshipped Allah,Allah is alive and will never die.’ [Abu Bakr radi Allahuanhu upon the death of Rasulalah sal Allahu alayhi wasallam]

***

Taqwa can be achieved after having a direct emotional link with Allah Subhanahu WaTa’la. Only what pleases Him, pleases you. And only what displeases Him, displeases you. Nothing and no-one else can budge you from your reference point of calmness except that which concerns Him. Consequently then, these emotions lead you to hastening in doing good deeds and abstaining from that which is prohibited and/or disliked without any distractions. These feelings stem from having fear of Allah Subhanahu WaTa’la or Taqwain your heart. A heart is like any other vessel and despite whatever a Muslimah claims, her heart is either inclined towards her Rabb or towards Dunia. There is no fifty-fifty ratio. There can never be no matter how much we say there is.So out of fear of Allah Subhanahu WaTa’la, she should be careful about the state of her heart. She must not worship the Creations. Either everything/everyone will leave you or you’ll leave them after you die. Therefore, a wise Muslimah focuses on worshipping her Lord because He’s the Ever-living.

‘Whatsoever is on it (the earth) will perish. And the Face of your Lord full of Majesty and Honor will remain forever.’ [Surah Ar-Rahman, 55:26-27]

He Subhanahu WaTa’la knows the sorrows in her heart and the silent wishes she’s had for long.

When people asked Abu ad-Darda RA about why he did not engage in poetry (unlike his contemporaries), he replied,

“Man wishes that he is given his desire;

Whereas Allah bars everything except that which He intends.

Man says: ‘My profit! My wealth!’

Whereas fear of Allah (Taqwa) is the best form of profit/benefit.’ [pp.5,Taqwa:The Provision of Believers]

Let’s pick up the story from where we left. When Zummurud married Zinkee and went out of Damascus to attend the wedding party, the corrupt advisors locked the doors of Damascus on her. They exclaimed, ‘You betrayed us and married Zinkee who had attacked us before!’

Zummurud’s new husband Zinkee abandoned her as well. She tried to seek help from the Khalifa(caliph) in Baghdad but she wasn’t able to see him because he too was corrupt and morally weak. She left royalty and went to live in Makkah to spend rest of her life where she ran out of money. There, the Cream of Royalty, ended up cooking, serving, sewing to support herself. Just before she died, she moved to Madinah because she knew the following Hadith of the Prophet, sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam:

At-Tabarani has reported with a sound chain of narration from a woman of Thaqif that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said, "He amongst you who is able to stay until death in Madinah must do so, as I shall be a witness or an intercessor for him on the Day of Judgement."

That is why 'Umar prayed to Allah to cause him to die in Madinah. Bukhari reported from Zaid bin Aslam, and he from his father that 'Umar said, "O Allah! Grant me martyrdom in Your cause, and cause me to die in the sanctuary of Your Prophet (peace be upon him). [Volume 5, Page 136: Excellence of Death in Madinah.]

After people had buried her, her servant told them that it was the Queen of Damascus that they had buried and stated her lineage. People never knew about her nobility before her death. SubhanAllah! Look at the humility of Zummurud! She didn’t tell the whole world what problems she had faced. She didn’t spread hate against the people who had hurt her constantly. She didn’t become bitter towards life and give up living. She didn’t end up ill out of depression and pessimistic attitude. She could’ve exclaimed that she was a failure in that her husband and children did not love her. She could’ve stopped being social because the people she cared about so much, didn’t inquire about her and where she disappeared. She could’ve considered herself a woman who had lost her honor completely because of what her social status was now after being a Queen surrounded by Kings left and right. It is nothing less than amazing how she survived every single test Allah Subhanahu WaTa’la tried her with and we pray to Allah Subhanahu WaTa’la that she gets the highest status in JannatulFirdaus al ‘Ala. Ameen.

All of us can use this story and relate to it. What is it that made Zummurud (R) so steadfast in her Deen? Clearly, her yearning to die in Madinah meant that she was still a devout worship despite those trials right before death. Didn’t she feel lonely? Didn’t she miss her deceased husband all this while? She might’ve felt stuck in destiny. She might’ve felt suffocated. What about the children she had? Surely, she wanted to see them, their wives and her grandchildren. Surely she was like any mother who loved her children to the core. Didn’t she fear unhappiness? Growing in the lap of luxury, how did she feel as she was serving other people to support herself when she had several servants to serve her for several years in the past? How did it feel like? Didn’t it shatter her heart into a million pieces whenever she visited the past and thought what could’ve been or what should’ve been?

Dear sisters, she had nothing but she had everything. Because she had Taqwa. Taqwa only came from knowledge. Zummurud (R) was a human. She might’ve felt sad. There’s nothing wrong with feeling sad.It’s okay to feel sad sisters! But soon after sadness, the fear of Allah Subhanahu WaTa’la should enter the heart and in that fear, a Muslimah mustn’t stop fulfilling her obligations. She mustn’t utter even a single word that displeases Allah Subhanahu WaTa’la. She mustn’t let Shaytan manipulate her and make her worship her emotions in the seemingly lows of her Qadr. Because the Rabb of the Creations, the Healer of the heart has promised her the following if she has Taqwa:

1.an antidote for loneliness and lack of love [Surah Ale Imraan, 3:76]

2.a means of a way out of problems [Surah at-Talaq, 65:2-3]

3.a source of honor [Surah Ar-Rad, 13:13]

4.a means of survival amidst bad news [Surah Yunus, 10:63-64]

5.only in those who have knowledge of Allah Subhanahu WaTa’la [Surah Fatir, 35:28]

Only Allah Subhanahu WaTa’la knows what status we have in His Sight and only He knows what status we would’ve achieved by the time we die. Our concern should be that how much of Taqwadid we have in the twenty,thirty,fourty,fifty years of our lives. Taqwa is God-consciousness. That lingering feeling in your head that you’re not alone as you’re indulged in doing something haram. That sort of feeling some people have when an authority figure is around such as a boss or teacher. The employee and the student try to ensure that they don’t do anything that might displease them. Because displeasing them means terrible consequences.

What does displeasing Allah Subhanahu WaTa’la mean? What does pleasing Him means?

‘And strain not your eyes in longing for the things We have given for enjoyment to various groups of them (polytheists and disbelievers in the Oneness of Allâh), the splendour of the life of this world that We may test them thereby. But the provision (good reward in the Hereafter) of your Lord is better and more lasting.And enjoin As-Salât (the prayer) on your family, and be patient in offering them [i.e. the Salât (prayers)]. We ask not of you a provision (i.e. to give Us something: money); We provide for you. And the good end (i.e. Paradise) is for the Muttaqûn (those who have Taqwa).’ [Surah Ta-Ha, 20:131-132]

Need another proof of His Love, dear Muslimah?

"Yes, if you hold on to patience and piety(has Taqwa),and the enemy comes rushing at you; your Lord will help you with five thousand angels having marks (of distinction)." Allâh made it not but as a message of good news for you and as an assurance to your hearts. And there is no victory except from Allâh, the All-Mighty, the All-Wise. [Surah Ale-Imraan, 3:125-126].

Could Zummurud have had survived the challenges in Qadr if she did not have firm belief in reward/punishment after death? Where does belief come from? Knowledge of course. How can one protect oneself from the whispers of Shaytan? By having knowledge of your enemy.

SufyaanAth-Thawree (rahimahullaah) said: "The excellence of knowledge is due only to the fact that it causes a person to fear(have Taqwa) and obey Allah, otherwise it is just like anything else." [Related by ibn Rajab]

Therefore, let’s quickly enroll and register in programs which will assist us in seeking knowledge. Because knowledge will lead us to Taqwa and Taqwa will secure our dunia and Akhira inshaAllah. Only Allah Subhanahu WaTa’la’s Promises are true so let’s seek refuge in Him and seek safety of our future through Him. And not through our jobs,loved ones,degrees. People and things come and go.Why depend on things which are bound to change? Can one ever expect to stand firmly on a boat that rocks and keep changing its’ position?

Let’s make an impermeable wall between us and sins today. Let’s fall in love with Allah Subhanahu WaTa’la with fear (Taqwa) and hope. Let’s promise ourselves that we’ll try not to be distracted and will make Allah Subhanahu WaTa’la and our Deen truly our first priority.

May Allah Subhanahu WaTa’la us live and die for His Sake. May He Subhanahu WaTa’la resurrect us amongst the Siddiqeen(Truthful ones), the Prophets, the Shuhada (the martyrs), and the Sawliheen (the righteous). Ameen.

And Allah Subhanahu WaTa’la knows best.

Now that we have a success story to motivate us, inshaAllah in the next article, we will discuss what are some of the steps to achieve Taqwa.

Please remember me in your duaas.

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Yes, Women Can Work! (Part 3)

by Khadeejah Islam

Click to view Part 1 and Part 2 of this series

Areas where women can lend their productivity

There are many areas where women can work. It can be at home or outside the home. It can be on a small scale. It can be freelance (not working for a fixed employer). It can be a field which you love. It can be paid or non-paid. The following are some (there might be many other) options, out of which, the first is obligatory and the rest are voluntary (you have the option of choosing). The voluntary options have to be chosen after consultation with the guardian (whether it is father or husband) and also after a deep assessment of the family needs, for instance, if you just had a baby, it is better to stay with him/her than to venture outside the home. During those times, you can still be productive by choosing the voluntary options which are home-based. Whatever you choose to do, do it for the sake of Allah alone; do it for an Islamic cause; and do it within the Islamic boundaries.

• Home-making: “Islam regards her role in society as a mother and a wife as the most sacred and essential one. Neither maids nor baby-sitters can possibly take the mother's place as the educator of an upright, complex free, and carefully-reared children. Such a noble and vital role, which largely shapes the future of nations, cannot be regarded as ‘idleness’.” [1].

• Business: You have a plethora of options regarding products/services which you can sell and base your business upon. Remember to be creative. That will add an extra boost to your business insha’Allah. The following are examples:

1. Clothing (including hijab materials). This is good for those who have interest in fashion designing.
2. Home-made food items, such as pickles, confectionery, etc., or food-chain franchise.
3. House-hold items. This covers a wide range of goods, such as candles, quilts, dry flowers, crystal/glass items, etc.
4. Jewellery designing. This is still an unconventional field. The job entails constructing exquisite pieces of jewellery using precious stones and metal ores.
5. Selling exceptional skills that you may have (in the form of services), such as being a writer, a photographer, a make-up artist/hair stylist, a doctor, an architect, a teacher, etc.

• Writing/Journalism: You can either publish your own book, or work as a journalist. “One should be careful to ensure that the style, contents and goal are beneficial and that the story helps to explain something about Islam and serves as an effective means of teaching and guiding people.” [2].

• Halaal Photography: Consult a local scholar to know the various rulings on photography. You can take photos of the nature and inanimate objects.

• Medicine: “Islam calls us to learn all kinds of beneficial knowledge. Branches of knowledge vary in status, the highest of which is knowledge of sharee’ah, then knowledge of medicine, then the other fields of knowledge.” [3]. We are badly in need of female doctors. I have been to a hospital recently and I was quite disappointed to see a shortage of female doctors. I am sure most of us are comfortable in discussing “girly” issues with female doctors only.

• Architecture: Apart from designing the framework of various structures, such as buildings and bridges, you can also engage in interior designing.

• Teaching: I feel this is a noble task. You can choose to impart either beneficial secular or Islamic knowledge/skills, or both. There are a variety of subjects to choose from.

• Event Management: You can take the charge of organizing an event, whether it is a wedding or an Islamic lecture, and managing its decoration, its food, its crowd, etc. It will be especially gratifying if you are able to pull off an event at a minimal cost and much to the pleasure of the attendees.

• Film-Making: I think this is one neglected area. We have a shortage of Islamic films and documentaries. If more people take up projects in this area, we will have sufficient halaal entertainment. This could also be an effective da’wah tool.

• Social Working: This is mostly non-paid, although a few organizations may pay you for volunteering. You have many causes to support, for instance, breast cancer awareness campaign, suicide prevention, alleviation of poverty and unemployment, da’wah projects, end to domestic violence and repression of women, AIDS awareness campaign, helping the disabled, and the list is really endless.

• Environmentalist: Again, this is a neglected area. We have few people who are taking actions to recycle, to keep the world cleaner and greener, to conserve water and electricity, to reduce global warming and pollution, to protest against massive tree-felling or hill-cutting, and to take care of birds and animals. “If any Muslim plants a tree or sows a field, and a human, bird or animal eats from it; it shall be reckoned as charity from him.” [4].

• Art: There are many options of halaal art. You can engage in Islamic calligraphy, glass painting, and drawing pictures of nature, abstract, or inanimate objects.

• Web Development: You can develop a website for a company and even choose to manage its content.

Footnotes:

[1] The Status of Women in Islam, Dr. Jamal Badawi. http://islamswomen.com/articles/status_of_women_in_islam.php

[2] http://islamqa.com/en/ref/4505/

[3] http://islamqa.com/en/ref/10471/

[4] Saheeh Al-Bukhari, Saheeh Muslim. http://www.islamreligion.com/category/98/

Please share your views on this series below so we can continue to bring you more beneficial content, inshaAllah :)

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Self Esteem : The Muslim Woman - A Warrior Of Sorts

by Anum Ali

The world has undoubtedly transformed into a big fireball of corrupt morals where a Muslim woman, in fact any woman, faces some serious issues that threaten to set ablaze her level of self-esteem. But as they say, “When the going gets tough, the tough gets going.” And so she should fight like a warrior, armed with the shield of self-esteem and the sword of her Iman (faith). There are several spatial, verbal, and physical ways that a woman can adopt to counter the issues she faces and self-esteem is the only way she would be able to use them, inshAllah.

This summer I was in Karachi city in Pakistan, my native country, and I got the opportunity to revisit the shops and bazaars. Trust me, in a bazaar, a woman is most unsafe and feels the most humiliated because the men treat you like toys. The illiterate and morally corrupt men would resort to touching you as you walk on the street or in shops, they would stare at you regardless of your Hijab and/or Niqab, and they would tease you with chants and mockery. Now you know why a woman is not allowed to step out of the house without a mehram (a male blood relative). Of course we change these principles, and sometimes we say that we have to, because the times have modernized and the Muslim woman has made her footprint in the fields of education and professionalism.

The weakness is in the functioning and the attitude of the woman herself. She feels that taking her brother, her husband, her father, or any other male relative along with her to common day places would be looked down upon. She feels that it would be very anti-feminism, or that people would assume that she is oppressed. Obviously, this is a self-esteem malfunction.

The best way to tackle such a social problem is to be accompanied by a male relative so the people out there know that they have a good chance of being beaten up if they harass a woman. However, there are times when women are with a male relative and yet she is harassed. Again, if she chooses to remain quiet about an incidence she has a self-esteem problem. If she is incapable of voicing out the wrong that’s being done to her, she is confused.

Let’s look at it detail as to what really goes wrong in the psychological thought process that makes a woman who’s been wronged, spiral into silence. When a woman is teased physically, visually, or verbally, say in a marketplace, she feels as if she is a weak creature that can be toyed around with. If she’s made the mistake of being alone in a social mess, then she feels unsafe because she has no defense. Or, even if she is not alone, she chooses not to “create a scene” because she feels that it would be an insult to her. And hence, she chooses to tolerate the harassment.

While speaking to a friend, I realized that there is a yet another concern that a Muslim woman faces and this one, being in the family, requires a more thought out approach. As the youth is acquiring proper knowledge about the principles and limitations of the Islamic religion, they’re beginning to realize which practices they should stay away from. The biggest challenge for a Muslim woman is to deal with the issue of non-mehrams (males who are not blood relatives) and how to avoid their “loving advances.” There are the distant uncles who leap to pat you on the head, or a namesake uncle who runs to gather you in a greeting hug. Now, because you have grown up and know your do’s and don’ts better, your biggest challenge is to refuse such uncles.

Usually, when a woman is unable to put up a worthy fight in face of such dilemmas, she initiates a series of negative conclusions inside her head that make matters worse. For instance, because a “sticky” male relative is a respectable elder or an influential family friend who you cannot back-answer or push away, you resort into thinking, “Why does it have to happen to me?” “I will be punished by Allah (swt),” “I’d never be able to escape him,” and etc. I recall such an uncle from my days of teenage. He had a habit of grabbing boys and girls and kissing them on their cheeks. Me and siblings used to hide when he visited on Eid, but eventually he would make his way everywhere. I realized that was a unsuccessful approach.

The idea behind a Muslim woman’s struggle is to be proactive about the issues that raise their heads and to tackle them with sensible and sober means. And always know that you MUST set the wrongs right because there is always going to be a lot of resistance from your family that approves of such instances while you do not. You should value your self-worth because that is exactly why Allah (swt) prescribed the codes of mehram and non-mehram, He knows how precious you are. As some women allow such physical gestures from distant male members of the family or friends, they are unaware that they’re providing Shaytan an easy path. Look around you, you wouldn’t have to go too far to find stories of incest and molestation and it may sound far-fetched, but intermingling with non-mehrams is what forms their basis.

A sister’s concern was that if she refuses a particular “touchy huggy” relative, he makes a loud statement about her being an “extremist.” That’s a favorite word the world has chosen to address each hard practicing Muslim by. She also fears that in family gatherings, refusing him would “create a scene”. Her dilemma is understandable, and her realization and anxiety about the problem is honorable. How many woman realize their worth and limitations this way? My advice in such situations is a “threefold approach" process:

1. Change your approach: Redefine the way you carry yourself. Be more sober and more reserved in the company of men, respond to their gestures by a simple Salam with the wave of a hand, and maintain a distance.
2. Approach the “subject”: If the “sticky uncle” doesn’t understand your spatial distance, then communicate your view to him. This can be done either directly, maintaining a good voice tone, or via a responsible family member who’s willing to help.
3. Re-approach with good mannerisms: If you cut off completely after your “confrontation” it may sever family ties. Maintain your greeting and respectful mannerism, but keep a distance.

When I compare a Muslim woman with a warrior, I do so because she expected to put up a worthy struggle against a fireball of fitnah that the world has become. Not only is she to shield herself but also ensure that she doesn’t become a fuel to aggravating it i.e. if you choose to remain quiet and passive you’d be encouraging such moral incorrectness. So guard your modesty with the power vested in you by Allah (swt). Look for people who would help you and make it easier for your fellow sisters.

Together we can, together we will, inshAllah.

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Resiliency Gained - A Guide to Stress Reduction

by Umm Amin


Bismillahi Arrahmani Irrahiim

SubhanAllah! Is the babying crying? Did you lose your job? Somebody is spreading rumors about you? People are talking about that hijab on your hair! Maybe you’ve got to get dinner on the table by 6 pm. Perhaps you are caring for a family member with a long term condition, like Alzheimer’s disease or Diabetes Mellitus. You might be noticing the lack of invitations to upcoming parties, or have it up to your neck with your three children that argue nonstop. You could be recovering from a loss or going through a divorce. Whatever individual test reaches you, chances are you can seriously benefit from stress reduction! Yes, you got it. Less stress: turn the intensity down and chill out! Alhamdulillah.

Stress is a biological response. Allah made us to respond this way. Whether it’s a cold ice cube in your hand, a startling noise, the smell of burning toast, a terrible sour milk taste, or seeing a vehicle approaching you head on; stress begins with intense and vivid stimuli that are sent to the brain. Your brain interprets the information it receives, and the threat is categorized into passing or an ongoing and real threat (Seaward, 2002). When your brain perceives a persistent threat, the nervous and endocrine systems pump up and prepare to respond. As a result, you may become jittery or on edge until the threat has passed and calmness ensues. Some of the physiological effects include a rapid heart rate, a pounding heart, increased blood pressure, rapid breathing, increased blood sugar, increased blood clotting, diarrhea, enhanced muscle strength, and increased sweating (Seaward, 2002). While these responses would normally be beneficial when you are trying to escape a frightening encounter, they can be irritating if you experience them for minor confrontations or your symptoms do not subside rapidly.

Most people experience a bit of stress now and then, but it’s usually experienced briefly. There are ill effects of ongoing or prolonged stress. Although the list of ailments is no comprehensive or all inclusive, stress can produce episodes of asthma, decreased immune response, tension headaches, fertility issues, heart failure, anxiety, depression, aging, muscular pain, gastrointestinal disease, ulcerative colitis, acne, diabetes, migraines, irritable bowel syndrome, heart disease, high blood pressure, rapid heartbeat, blood clots, canker sores, teeth grinding, gingivitis, and psoriasis exacerbations(Griffin, 2010; Heller, Lee, and Koo, 2011; Nazario, 2010; Seaward, 2002; Tofler, Silver, and Solomon, 2011). Unmanaged stress spirals out of control, other illnesses flare up, and it becomes difficult to do your daily activities like waking up for fajr on time or completing household chores.

Since stress is detrimental to our long term health, it interferes with our performance as wives mothers, sisters, and parents. Poor coping techniques make our loved ones frustrated with our stress responses. It is imperative to whittle stress down to manageable levels. Stress can be ameliorated with a variety of management methods including guided imagery, time management, organization, visualizations, aromatherapy, conscious relaxation, humor, breathing techniques, meditation, and exercise (Chang and Shen, 2011; Kornsweig, 2011; Seaward, 2002; Sibinga et al., 2011).

You may be thinking, that’s all good but how can I relate to stress personally? Think of where Allah says in the Qur’an, Surah Ibraheem, 32-34, “It is Allah who created the heavens and the earth and sent down rain from the sky and produced thereby some fruits as provision for you and subjected for you the ships to sail through the sea by His command and subjected for you the fivers. And He subjected for you the sun and the moon, continuous [in orbit], and subjected for you the night and the day. And He gave you from all you asked of Him. And if you should count the favor [i.e. blessings] of Allah, you could not enumerate them. Indeed, mankind is [generally] most unjust and ungrateful.” By taking a few moments to focus on the simple parables that surround us, we have the opportunity to reflect upon the bounties we cherish every day. Enjoying a few moments basking in the sun, or contemplating the freshness of the drizzling rain that in turn brings forth fragrant and delicious fruits reduces stress and reminds us to set aside a few moments for relaxation and reflection. It also provides a few moments to thank Allah for the numerous simple treasures we cherish on a daily basis. 

That little voice keeps coming back to your head. In your mind you are saying, yea, but I need some real tips that I can put into my daily life. Finding a solution to your stress is an easy recipe. By starting a journal you can both jot down triggers to help you identify when stress is surmounting so you can take steps to intervene. You can also use reflective journaling as a means to positively cope and reframe your experiences to prevent your response to set backs or frustrations from being exaggerated.

There is an abundance of ways that you can fit stress reduction into your daily life. You can modify your lifestyle by adding in daily exercise, scheduling in naps or relaxations sessions, and limiting jitter inducing caffeine laden drinks such as cola, tea, coffee, and energy drinks. You can focus on having a positive outlook, and reframing problems to put them into perspective. You can ask for help, or exchange tips with other women while also enjoying the benefits of building loving friendship and engaging in camaraderie. You can learn relaxation techniques, like deep breathing, guided imagery, visualizations, acupressure points, or aromatherapy. Simply getting out into the outdoors relieves stress, increases your production of important neurotransmitters, enhances your mood, and affords you the opportunity to count the natural wonders and blessed beauties that surround you.

If you still lack beneficial strategies for reducing stress in your life, get out a pen and paper to start your personal stress buster list. Start out your list with some of the suggestions in the Ten Tension Reducers List, but add in additional ideas you dream up. Post the list in a place that will be easily accessible when you are feeling the constraints of stress. Make sure you pause and make a cognizant effort to select one of these liberating activities the next time you feel under duress.

Ten Tension Reducers

1. Spend 15-30 minutes reviewing surahs you have already memorized. You will find pleasure and comfort in reciting familiar words of the Qur’aan. Take a few minutes to reflect on the meaning of the ayat and apply them to your life.

2. Laugh. Tell a joke. Share a funny story with someone. Better yet, have a humor pal and send jokes to one another once a week. You’ll have something to anticipate in the mail!

3. Make a poem. Mount it on colorful construction paper. Decorate the edges with pretty ribbon. Gift it to a friend or loved one.

4. Take a walk in the park, or hike a nature trail. If you enjoy running, swimming, or biking, do it outside!

5. Plant a tree, a flower, or a small herb garden. Go back to enjoy it and rest by it from time to time.

6. Surround yourself with positive reinforcements and affirmations. Use quotes as well as bright, vivid images. Make a collage or paint a poster to hang up later. The picture you create will be both inspiring and invigorating later on.

7. Read a book to a child or elderly person. It will be a moment to relax and share together.

8. Practice deep breaths in which you draw air into your diaphragm and slowly let the air out. Mix it up by adding in a relaxing cup of mint or verbena tea.

9. Increase the colorful fruits and veggies in your diet! Get out to the local market to select fresh, beautiful natural food choices. Supplement that with a healthy dose of water each day.

10. Put a few drops of bergamot or eucalyptus oil into a warm bath. Top it off with some bubbles. It’s time for a good soak to relax your muscles and mind from head to toe.

References

Chang, K-M, and Shen, C-W. (2011). Aromatherapy benefits autonomic nervous system regulation for  elementary school faculty in taiwan. Evidence Based Complementary and Alternative Medicine.
Griffin, M. (2010). 10 health problems related to stress that you can fix. WebMD.  http://www.webmd.com/balance/stress management/features/10-fixable -stress-related-health-problems
Heller, M.M., Lee, E.S., Koo, J.Y. (2011). Stress as an influencing factor in psoriasis. Skin Therapy Lett,  16(5), 1-4.
Kornsweig, J. (2011). Mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR): a monograph. Oriental Medicine, Spring, 19-33.
Nazario, B. (2010). How stress affects you oral health. WebMD. http://www.webmd.com/oral-health/healthy-teeth-2/stress-teeth
Saheeh International. (1997). The Qur’aan: An authentic, accurate, and clear English translation. Riyadh, Saudi Arabia: Abulqasim Publishing House.
Seaward, B. L. (2002). Managing stress: principles and strategies for health and wellbeing. 3rd ed. Sudbury, MA: Jones an Bartlett Publishers, Inc.
Sibinga, E., Kerrigan, D., Steward, M., Johnson, K., Magyari, T., and Ellen, J. (2011). Mindfulness-based stress reduction for urban youth. The Journal of Alternative and Complementary Medicine, 17(3), 213-218.
Tofler, G.H., Silver, J.M., and Solomon, D. (2011). Psychosocial and other acute factors in acute myocardial infarction. UpToDate. http://www.uptodate.com

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Yes, Women Can Work! (Part 2)

View Part 1 of this series HERE.


by Khadeejah Islam

The need to be productive and hence, working

Although most of the women now have a vision to be productive, there are many who do not have any definite aims. Why do we need to have big goals? What is the need to be productive? Why should we consider leaving a legacy? How does it matter if one woman does not contribute? Let us look at some of the reasons why a woman should be productive:

• Reward: We need to think of work as a ladder to success in the Hereafter. When a Muslimah looks after the sick, she will be rewarded insha’Allah. When a Muslimah raises children as good human beings, she will be rewarded insha’Allah.

• Halaal earning: There is nothing wrong in having a halaal earning, which she can invest in da’wah or charity projects. She can also utilize it to finance the needs of the family.

• Dispel the misconception: Many consider Muslim women as backward and oppressed. When you contribute to your family and the wider community, you are representing Islam in a positive light. This could work as an effective da’wah technique. Moreover, you will be helping to dispel much of Islamophobia. When non-Muslims see that you have the best kids in the neighbourhood, they will be inquisitive about Islam. When you start a project which eases the sufferings of others, it will soften the hearts of people.

• Catering to the needs of the Ummah: By starting up a project, you might be able to reduce unemployment and poverty. In addition, you might be able to inspire others to be productive in the society. With the number of Muslims rising, we need to have sufficient halaal output so that Muslim men, women and children have enough halaal options for entertainment, education, employment, and many other facilities.

• Utilize your blessings to the fullest: We are indeed blessed with many things, such as good health, sound mind, special skills, free will, merciful heart, basic amenities and much more. We need to recognize and utilize these to the fullest to show our gratefulness to Allah. Therefore, develop your hobbies and other special skills. This could also help you to avoid boredom. Remember that an idle mind allows Shaytan to instill evil thoughts, such as jealousy, suspicion, despair, etc. in you.

Similarities between Muslim house-wives and “working” women and how they both work

We often assume that the world of a working woman is distinct from the world of a house-wife. As a result, many women debate that either one of the two is superior to the other. I find this division unnecessary and illogical. Both types of women are indeed working – in their own fields, with their own levels of expertise. What we need to see is whether they have contributed to the best of their abilities in their respective fields. Have they succeeded in raising the most wonderful kids in the neighbourhood? Have they volunteered for a noble cause? Have they promoted, say, modesty by selling hijab materials? Apart from these, they share some excellent qualities and emotions:

• Undoubtedly, both want to balance work with other duties. In most cases, both are not so blinded by ambition that they will abandon their families. They believe in moderation, and at the end of the day, seek rewards from Allah.

• Both want to be productive solely for the sake of Allah. They are very clear about their intentions as well as their visions. They stay away from any activity which is forbidden by the Qur’an and Sunnah. Both want to incorporate Islam into every thing they do, wherever they are, whether at home or outside the home.

• Both have some womanly instincts in common, for example, empathy for others, appreciation for modesty, the ability to forgive quickly, concern for their families, etc.

How to encourage productivity of women

There are many men who complain about time-shifts. How can a woman pay attention to the family if she is working outside her home from 9 A.M. to 4 P.M., or even longer? The answer is quite simple. Everyone should come forward to build a workplace/work environment based on the teachings of Islam, instead of complaining about the lack of it! Therefore, for instance, time-shifts could be shorter and more flexible so that each woman will have to work outside the home for a couple of hours only, or will have the opportunity to take breaks between the working hours. Moreover, there are always home-based options.

Inspire others to be productive. Start with the people around you. Remind them why it is important to be productive. Recognize their talents if they have not done so themselves. Inspire them to be moderate and balanced.

Men could greatly encourage the women, whether she is a mother, wife, or sister, by helping with their projects. They can advise, or even take up certain areas of the project in their own hands. They may even initiate a certain project and delegate certain responsibilities to the women.

Make duaa. Ask Allah to enable Muslim women to be productive.

To be continued insha’Allah…

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The Story Of The Queen Continues (part 2)

by Umm Sulaym

To read part one of this series, click HERE

Dearest Readers:

Asalamo alaykum warahmatullah,

You wonder why Taqwa is such a big deal. 

The simple answer is: it helps an individual survive. 

If a Muslimah adorns proper Taqwa of Allah SubhanahuWaTa’la, it will help through her divorce. Through her marital problems, phase of unemployment, child-less marriage life, difficult university courses, minimal prospects for marriage proposals, physical and psychological challenges. Through all those times when everything seems to stab her motivation and prevents her from reaching her potential. 

She has hope amidst all those problems. She has hope in Taqwa (God consciousness) of Allah SubhanahuWaTa’la.

O Silence envelope me,

As I make myself vulnerable to growin love,

Like a broken-winged bird,

My heart is fearful to soar to the skies above...

O Silence envelope me,

As I hand my heart to The One High Above,

Whether He crushes it for my good or comforts it,

I know I will embrace it all and grow in love.

O Dear Silence envelope me,

Resonate deep within me,

For I have given Him everything I had,

With my Salah, my sacrifice, my life, my death

I gave the Self-Sufficient

my unwavering contentment for the good and the bad.

O Silence envelope me!

Envelope the noise within me...

As I sit, I hesitantly smile,

My eyes focused on the Prize,

Realizing that its surrounded by temptations and trials,

I fear,

I hope,

I suddenly tear,

Yet I know I'll cope…

As I fall in love

…Helplessly

Absolutely…

…Completely.

The Waterfallssing me Your Praise,

The Clouds thunder as they magnify Your Name,

All the Creations are doing your Tasbeeh,

Won’t Youallow me too to prove the love that I claim?

O Silence envelope me,

As my knowledgehelps me fall in love with Ar-Raheem,

YaRabb! Help me build the boat of Taqwa,

And please lead it safely to Jannah’s streams.

Ameen.

***

King Boorie died. Zummurud (Rahimullah) was a woman after all, so she might’ve felt the pain. She might’ve suffered the loneliness. She might’ve shed tears. But like the laws of Universe, nothing ever stops. No fairy godmother comes and uses a wand to change your world. One must move on with one’s purpose of life.With the strength of Taqwabi’itnillah.

Queen Zummurud(R)’s son Ismaa’eel became the next King. She was a righteous woman and one would expect that her son would too be righteous. However, that was far from the truth. To make matters worse for Zummurud (R) after her husband’s death, her son Ismaa’eel made the survival of the people under his care, a living hell. Drinking, devouring people’s money and torturing people was something he got notorious for. Zummurud(R)’s other son Sunj tried to shake some sense into his brother. But instead of listening, Ismaa’eel locked him up in the dungeons and starved him to death. Complaints flooded Zummurud’s attention for long and she tried what she could. But Ismaa’eel went to that extra length and he started spreading rumors about his own mother. He accused her of Zina or illegal sexual relations! Notice sisters, Zummurud (R) didn’t faint or create a scene. She didn’t commit suicide now that her honor was completely destroyed. SubhanAllah! If that wasn’t enough, Ismaa’eel plotted with the Crusaders, the enemies of the Muslims, to ‘sell away’ Damascus in exchange for being granted governorship under the Crusaders’ Rule.

Now Zummurud (R) couldn’t tolerate it anymore. It was another thing that Ismaa’eel had severely hurt her by killing her son Sunj and tarnishing her honor. But now it was a matter of loyalty to the nation. Sisters, she could’ve taken a back-seat and let the men handle the political issues. She could’ve wailed and died out of depression because things had stopped working out after her husband’s death. She could’ve surrendered for she was surrounded by corrupt governors who supported Ismaa’eel. She could’ve confined herself to her room all her life deep in ‘Ibada. But she didn’t because the knowledge of Islam empowered her with a solution. And she wanted to be part of the solution and not the problem. She consulted the judge whether she could implement hudood punishment on Ismaa’eel (recall he had killed Sunj). The judge said that it was permissible.

Zummurud(R) ordered her servants and guards to lock the palace doors and ordered Ismaa’eel to be killed as soon as he entered. 

Would anyone of us ever imagine that for our own child? Would anyone of us even bother sacrificing our sleep or rising career that conflicts our religious values for the Sake of Allah SubhanahuWaTa’la? Or that brother we are intending marry because he has everything except strength of Deen?

The hallway echoed with her son’s last words, ‘Zinhaar (Protect me)! Zinhaar (protect me)!’ Zummurud (R) knew that what may not seem right to her heart was what was right for her nation. Allah SubhanahuWaTa’la’s fear over Shaytan’s manipulative emotions. She was a mother saw her son die in front of her very eyes. A woman who was a loyal Queen before she was a mother. A loyal Queen who was a Faqihah (scholar of Fiqh) foremost. A Faqihah who had feared her Lord so much so that she was willing to sacrifice the baby she had nurtured in her womb for nine months. After all she had suffered despite being a good Muslimah. She could’ve asked herself what all these years of knowledge of Islam helped her in anyway. Her Eeman could’ve weakened. But what made her so strong?

“…It is only those who have knowledge among His slaves that fear Allâh. Verily, Allâh is All-Mighty, Oft-Forgiving.” [Surah Fatir, 35:28]

She was taken to court and was held accountable in front of the judge. Since she was a Faqiha, the judge that she had sought consultation prior to taking such a step. 

Zummurud(R) didn’t take the easy way out. Unlike most of us, who are willing to take off jilbab/niqaab at the smallest of tests and self-created fears. Zummurud(R)’s heart was so firm in the fear of Allah SubhanahuWaTa’la that the fear of the people didn’t have the chance to enter!

Shihab-ad-Deen Mahmood, her next son, was appointed the new King. Since he was of weak personality, Zummurud(R) had to make most of the decisions. With her previous experience, she ordered certain things to be changed in the society and almost immediately there was Barakah in her efforts. A place which suffered at the hands of a tyrant transformed into a shining land of prosperity. She abolished taxes, started the biggest school (called al-Khatooniyya) and so harmony prevailed. Naturally, like always, when a righteous Muslimah conquers all her desires and fears, Iblees deploys soldiers of Shayateen against you. The fraudulent advisors who previously benefitted from the corrupt rule of her son Ismaa’eel did not appreciate the reforms instituted by Zummurud(R). Since the new King, Mahmood, was obedient to his mother and complied to her orders, they couldn’t use him as a pawn. So they schemed to get rid of her in order to influence Mahmood! They suggested Zummurud(R) to marry Imaadaz-Zinkee who was the ruler of another land near Damascus (refer back to the previous article to find out who he was). In the past, one of the reasons why Kings and Queens married was to unite two regions which were fighting to uphold peace and harmony. Thinking that it might be an excellent way that may bring benefit to her people, Zummurud(R) agreed.

Did Zummurud(R)’s trials end there? Not really.

Will yours after getting that job, degree, getting married, having cute children? Not at all.

‘Whoever tastes the sweetness of Truth, every hardship on his path becomes easy for him.’ [From the book: هكذاعلمتنيالحياة by Dr. Mustafa al-Suba’i]

Truth = knowledge of the Lord = Taqwa

.:Story to be continued inshaa’Allah:.

And Allah SubhanahuWaTa’la knows best.

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